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Monday, November 26, 2012

My new happy place and relationships...

I actually have a few different "happy places", depending on my mood.  Sometimes it's on a long run alone or with a good friend, sometimes it's on a drive or hike up in the beautiful mountains, sometimes it's in a spin class with one of my favorite instructors, sometimes it's on a date with my husband and sometimes it's simply at home with the kids around me - sometimes. ;)

Today I discovered a new "happy place", and that's in the weight room, training with Misty.  You see, in order for it to be a happy place, in my opinion, you need to be sensitive and receptive to the feelings provided to you by that place or setting, whether it's a feeling of peace and tranquility, endorphin release, calm, joy, learning or excitement.

As I've been going through these training sessions, I've made several realizations.  I think it's in our nature as human beings to be naturally drawn to certain people in our lives for various reasons.  For the most part, I think it's common for us to be drawn to the people who bring out the best in us, the ones who, for whatever reason, are able to tap into our internal desire to be better people.  I've found that special connection with a select few in my life.  My husband, of course (and thankfully), but throughout the years there have been a few others I have come in contact with who have touched my life in such a way that I wouldn't be the same person without their existence.  I treasure those people immensely and I hope they know who they are, though maybe I should reach out and tell them more often.  (This life is short, we all should.)  Misty has quickly become one of those people in my life.

This year has been a turning point for me.  Despite all that I've already accomplished during my lifetime, this seemingly endless quest to conquer my physical body and gain control of things I've previously felt out of control over, was what had me searching for answers.  Right now, the answers seem to be coming in the form of gaining strength, more strength than I've ever had before, both physically and mentally, and being in control of how I choose to fuel my body.  I really believe that the combination of these two things are what will bring about the changes I am looking for.  And it's not just about how I want to look on the outside, or what physical feat I may be able to accomplish next, but also about finally gaining that sense of who I am and what I'm worth.  Anyone out there who may also be a victim of sexual abuse, such as I was at a young age, can probably also understand the power and healing that can come from gaining control over such things.  It's taken me a long time to understand this concept and effectively put it into the context of my life.

Today while I was working with Misty, she said a few things to me that were a little revealing about how I may be perceived by others.  I could really feel the sincerity behind her words and her genuine desire to see me succeed at reaching my goals.  She is helping me realize that 37 years old is not too old to change your life, no matter what has happened in the past.  It's never too late to try to become the person you've always wished you were.  Setbacks are inevitable, but persistence always wins out.  This I know from training for and running my first marathon at the age of 35 after never having been a runner previously.  Misty is helping me put that tenacity I've learned into practice in the weight room, which will change me.  She's helping me see that I am a lot stronger than I thought and her confidence in my future success makes me want to try harder and do more.

Not to mention the fact that she is an endless fountain of knowledge concerning all things physical fitness and physiology, and you all know I'm a virtual sponge when it comes to learning about this kind of stuff.  Hence, my happy place. :)

Now, on to today's workout!  We did legs again and it was awesome.  I love feeling a little shaky and weak in the knees after a good leg workout.  After about an hour and a half in the weight room, I had just enough time to go to the grocery store for an interim shopping trip and then back to the gym for a spinning class at noon.  Spinning was also awesome.  I think that since cutting back on my spin classes from 5 a week to two, my body craves that incomparable sweat purge because I'm pretty sure I sweated more today than I ever have!  I love it!

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