Feelin' it.

Another great couple of days in my little workout world. :)

Yesterday I went to Muscle Fusion X and enjoyed an awesome, high-intensity interval training session.  After class, Misty and I spent about an hour doing my second leg workout for the week.  The routine included walking lunges, lying hamstring curls, glute kickbacks, lateral lunges and using the multihip machine to do inner/outer thighs.  It was a little tough to get through a leg workout after doing MFX for an hour - my legs were already fatigued from doing jumps, lunges and squats in class.  It's all good, though.  I am really enjoying the burning I feel in my glutes and hamstrings today.  I love being able to feel the change.

This morning I was back at the gym for yet another session with Misty, my last big strength training session for the week.  We worked chest, shoulders and triceps.  Thankfully, the pain in my bicep wasn't too bad and actually, I didn't even notice it much while doing today's exercises.  After weights, I went to Misty's spin class.  So good.

More realizations today.  First of all, some people whine, some people just do things and ignore any pain, discomfort or opposition they may face.  It takes a conscious effort to shift your thoughts away from the negative and just focus on the task at hand.  Similar to the last 6.2 miles of a marathon, I am finding there are moments while lifting weights that my body is telling me, "enough already", but I must ignore it and push on if I want to see improvement.  I am taking a cue from Misty on this one - she's one of the toughest women I've met, both physically and mentally.  I know I can do it because I've had to do it several times before during some of my hardest long runs and races.  I almost think it takes even more strength and mental focus to hang in there to the end of an hour or more of lifting because it would be easier to quit.  When you're running a marathon, of course there is always the option of stepping out at any time (though not an option I've ever allowed myself), but it's less likely because there are all the other people around you that are still going, and people on the sidelines cheering you on, helping you keep the momentum going until the finish line.  When you're lifting and in a weight room filled with other people just mulling around, resting between sets and casually walking and chatting, it takes a lot of focus to push through those tough sets towards the end of the session.  Your muscles are fatigued, your mind is starting to wander, and there's plenty of distraction.  I have to keep reminding myself that it's those last few reps that matter the most.  The ones where my arms are shaking and my head feels like it's going to explode - that's where the most gains are made.  I really need to work on getting tough.  I don't like feeling weak.

Tomorrow is my last (official) meeting with Misty, probably for a while.  (Sad, sad day.)  She's going to be doing another body assessment on me, since we're two weeks out now.  After that, we'll do some ab exercises and then I will have gone through all of the exercises she has me doing on my schedule and I will be on my own.  I am motivated by the fact that today while I was working out, Chris (who was doing his own strength training at the time) came up to me and said he could already see changes in my arms and back in just these two weeks.  That's awesome.  That makes me excited and hopeful.  My short-term goal is to feel good enough to post some progress pictures for you all in another 6 weeks.  We'll see... :)

Training with Misty, day 6.

On Wednesday of last week, I made my first attempt at a pull-up and worked my biceps so much that I could barely move my arms for several days.  Yesterday was attempt number 2 at the same workout.  I prepared myself mentally for what I knew would be a tough workout, but I felt determined going into it that I would have improved over last week.

So as Misty and I walked into the weight room and she asked, "Okay, pull-ups.  Are you ready for this?"  I reluctantly but firmly said, "Yep."  As I stood on the little stool and grasped the bar, I bent my knees and lifted my feet and Misty held them, telling me to use her to push against with my legs as I pulled myself up.  For some reason, I have a hard time allowing myself to push against her, so on my first try, I pulled up but barely was able to pull up a few inches.  Finally, I relented and as I tried for the second pull-up, I did dig my feet into her just a little, enough to actually get my head up near the bar.  But as I did, still mostly using my arms to pull myself up (and less correctly, not mainly using my lats to initiate the pull-up movement) I felt a searing pain through my right bicep.  In a split second, all the pain from last week that had finally receded was instantly back, and then some.  And the fact that it was only in one arm let me know that I had actually pulled the muscle.

I did finish out the set of pull-ups (I think I did 7 or 8 of them), though I was forced to get a lot of help from my legs and from Misty.  Instead of doing "super sets", as Misty calls them, where I do two different exercises back-to-back without rest - in this case it would have been the pull-ups alternated with rope bicep curls - she had me just do one at a time, resting in between each set.  I did a second set of pull-ups, this time using some hand/wrist straps to help take some of the pressure off of my grip as I pulled up.  The straps actually helped a lot, but a little too late since I had already hurt my bicep.  My third set of pull-ups I did on the assist machine, which felt the best of all. :)

As I moved on to the next sets of exercises, my right arm was screaming at me every time I did the bicep curling motion.  Misty decided to cut out the rest of my bicep exercises and we just spent the rest of our time focusing on my back exercises.  I did iso-lateral rows, close-grip lat pulls, standing cable push downs and lower back extensions.  It was a great workout, but I am super bummed about my stupid bicep.  I spent the rest of the day yesterday icing it every couple of hours, taking ibuprofen and drinking extra BCAA's (Branch Chain Amino Acids) in my water.

Thankfully today is another leg work day, so I can let my arms rest and hopefully tomorrow my chest/shoulder/tri workout won't be impeded too much.  I am LOVING these days with Misty.  Every day I find myself getting more and more excited about doing work in the weight room and using strength training as the focus of my workouts.  I never thought I would feel this way.  Lifting weights has always been a secondary and frankly, less important part of my fitness routine due to my love of a good, hard cardio workout.  I wish I would have discovered sooner that weight lifting is what will change the shape of my body.  It hasn't even been two full weeks yet and I can already feel some changes.  I won't say I can "see" the changes quite yet, but I can feel it coming.  Besides, Misty made me look her in the eye yesterday and promise that by next summer I would happily put on a swim suit and go out, in public, and swim with my kids.  I haven't felt comfortable in a bathing suit since having kids.  I really, really hate to be seen in a bathing suit.  That has to change.  It's stupid.

Anyway, after doing weights yesterday, my schedule called for a "short run".  I opted to just use a treadmill while I was already at the gym and sweaty.  I did a 3.5 mile run in about 35 minutes and called it good.  Today after my leg workout, I get to do Muscle Fusion X with Misty, too.  It's been two weeks since we've had this class, because of Thanksgiving last week and I am super excited.

Shoulders, Core, interval run.

Another great day at the gym.  I started out in the weight room with Misty.  Today we worked on shoulders and abs again.  I'm still feeling a little anxious about how I will be able to do some of the exercises on my own when Misty's not right there with me.  For example, while doing planks today, she put a 25 pound weight on my back.  How will I do that when I'm working out alone?  When I was doing lateral and front raises and reverse dumb bell flys, I couldn't even lift my arms all the way to where she wanted me to without her giving me a little "lift" at the top.  I know it will come with time, but it is kind of frustrating.

After another humbling hour in the weight room, I went upstairs to a treadmill and got busy doing my interval run.  I did it the same as last week, topping out at a max speed of 8.7 mph.  I did a little over 4 miles in just under 40 minutes, with a cool down for another 10 minutes after that.  Some of the self-esteem I lost in the weight room was retrieved when another woman at the gym came up to me as I was finishing my run and said she was amazed that I could run for that long.  Considering that a 40 minute run is "short" for me, I was flattered.

Tomorrow, a new day full of fun challenges.  I get to give pull-ups another try, and hopefully I won't put my arms out of commission for another week! :)

My new happy place and relationships...

I actually have a few different "happy places", depending on my mood.  Sometimes it's on a long run alone or with a good friend, sometimes it's on a drive or hike up in the beautiful mountains, sometimes it's in a spin class with one of my favorite instructors, sometimes it's on a date with my husband and sometimes it's simply at home with the kids around me - sometimes. ;)

Today I discovered a new "happy place", and that's in the weight room, training with Misty.  You see, in order for it to be a happy place, in my opinion, you need to be sensitive and receptive to the feelings provided to you by that place or setting, whether it's a feeling of peace and tranquility, endorphin release, calm, joy, learning or excitement.

As I've been going through these training sessions, I've made several realizations.  I think it's in our nature as human beings to be naturally drawn to certain people in our lives for various reasons.  For the most part, I think it's common for us to be drawn to the people who bring out the best in us, the ones who, for whatever reason, are able to tap into our internal desire to be better people.  I've found that special connection with a select few in my life.  My husband, of course (and thankfully), but throughout the years there have been a few others I have come in contact with who have touched my life in such a way that I wouldn't be the same person without their existence.  I treasure those people immensely and I hope they know who they are, though maybe I should reach out and tell them more often.  (This life is short, we all should.)  Misty has quickly become one of those people in my life.

This year has been a turning point for me.  Despite all that I've already accomplished during my lifetime, this seemingly endless quest to conquer my physical body and gain control of things I've previously felt out of control over, was what had me searching for answers.  Right now, the answers seem to be coming in the form of gaining strength, more strength than I've ever had before, both physically and mentally, and being in control of how I choose to fuel my body.  I really believe that the combination of these two things are what will bring about the changes I am looking for.  And it's not just about how I want to look on the outside, or what physical feat I may be able to accomplish next, but also about finally gaining that sense of who I am and what I'm worth.  Anyone out there who may also be a victim of sexual abuse, such as I was at a young age, can probably also understand the power and healing that can come from gaining control over such things.  It's taken me a long time to understand this concept and effectively put it into the context of my life.

Today while I was working with Misty, she said a few things to me that were a little revealing about how I may be perceived by others.  I could really feel the sincerity behind her words and her genuine desire to see me succeed at reaching my goals.  She is helping me realize that 37 years old is not too old to change your life, no matter what has happened in the past.  It's never too late to try to become the person you've always wished you were.  Setbacks are inevitable, but persistence always wins out.  This I know from training for and running my first marathon at the age of 35 after never having been a runner previously.  Misty is helping me put that tenacity I've learned into practice in the weight room, which will change me.  She's helping me see that I am a lot stronger than I thought and her confidence in my future success makes me want to try harder and do more.

Not to mention the fact that she is an endless fountain of knowledge concerning all things physical fitness and physiology, and you all know I'm a virtual sponge when it comes to learning about this kind of stuff.  Hence, my happy place. :)

Now, on to today's workout!  We did legs again and it was awesome.  I love feeling a little shaky and weak in the knees after a good leg workout.  After about an hour and a half in the weight room, I had just enough time to go to the grocery store for an interim shopping trip and then back to the gym for a spinning class at noon.  Spinning was also awesome.  I think that since cutting back on my spin classes from 5 a week to two, my body craves that incomparable sweat purge because I'm pretty sure I sweated more today than I ever have!  I love it!

On my own again.

This week has been great, but a little weird for me.  I felt like I got a fresh, fast, running start, with three wonderfully hard days in a row of working with Misty.  I was feeling inspired, motivated, encouraged and ready to dig my heels in and get going on creating the new me.  Then Thanksgiving threw me a little curve, requiring a change in my routine, followed by these past two days of missing Misty while she recovers from her back injury, stalling my forward momentum.  I just don't feel like I get the same intensity of workout when I'm doing it on my own, versus having Misty right there with me.  My husband tried to help me out by throwing out a "You got this, girl!!" every once in a while.  I guess that's his best Misty impression.  It's just something I'm going to have to work on - making myself lift heavier, lift harder, lift more, regardless of what's going on around me.

Yesterday I did that second leg workout, which went alright, though I'm only minimally sore in my legs today - not a good sign.  Today I was on my own again, so this morning I went to the park and walked for about 5.4 miles.  It actually felt really good to be out in the brisk morning air.  Helped clear my head.  Then this afternoon, Chris and I went to the gym where (with his help) I did my last strength training session for the week - chest/shoulders/triceps.

I was happy I made it through the whole workout, which took me just under an hour.  My biceps and forearms are still dishing me a great deal of pain.  So much so that I woke up several times during the night due to the discomfort and feeling a bit of anxiety over the impact this pain and limited mobility might have on my workout routine.

I am trying consciously to maintain my current level of enthusiasm for my new routine.  Not that I don't want to do it, I do.  I have to keep remembering my goals and reminding myself that it's going to be a step-at-a-time type of deal.  Just keep lifting, just keep lifting...

Thankfully, it sounds like Misty will be back to help me next week and I will be able to fill in the gaps in my training.  By the end of next week, I should have a pretty good handle on what I will be doing on daily basis for the next 7 weeks or so.

Disappointed, but not all is lost.

Today I was supposed to meet Misty at the gym to do a chest/shoulders/tricep workout followed by a spinning class, also taught by Misty.  Unfortunately, I got a text from her early this morning saying that she needed to rest because of her menacing back injury.  She suggested I do my 2nd weekly leg workout today instead of what was on my schedule.

I have to admit, I selfishly felt a twinge of disappointment.  I look so forward to my training sessions with Misty and I'm also hesitant about doing them on my own.  Obviously though, Misty's well-being is infinitely more important than my insecurities, so I just needed to get over myself and get to the gym and get it done.

The leg workout consisted of different exercises than my leg workout earlier in the week, so I had to sort of guess at what she wanted me to do for some of them.  Thankfully, my husband was able to come with me and he helped me with some of the machines and he also helped me keep my form in check.

Lateral lunges

Glute kickbacks

It was probably opportune that things worked out this way because my arms are still unbelievably sore and tight from my bicep/back workout on Wednesday and I'm not sure how well I could have done another arm workout today.

It took me about an hour and a half to do my whole leg workout, which included 6 different exercises, 4 sets of 8-10 reps each.  When I finished, I had just enough time to rest for a few minutes before going to spin class.  My performance during spinning was a little lackluster as well; my body is feeling pretty depleted at this point in the week.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining.  I am happy that I have this opportunity to challenge my body this way.

Hopefully tomorrow Misty will be able to return to the gym to round out the week with one final session together.  If not, I will be on my own to figure out the chest/shoulder/tricep workout.  I can do it, right?  Silly question... :)

Switching it up for the holiday.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!  I started my day with a bit of a turkey trot, like many of you runners out there!  My friend Lisa and I ran one of our favorite routes, a total of 12 miles.  Normally Thursdays will be another weight training day, followed by Muscle Fusion X, but today the gym was closed so I got to do my long run (otherwise reserved for Saturdays).

Despite the fact that I could still barely move my arms because of the muscle soreness from yesterday's workout, we had a great run and a decent pace: 9:42 min/mile.  When we finished I came home and did my ab workout for the day, per Misty's instructions.  It took me about 15 minutes to do 3 sets of 4 different ab exercises, 20 reps each.

By the time I finished that, I was running pretty low on energy and feeling total body soreness.  Still, I mustered the strength to make 2 clean pumpkin pies and clean dinner rolls, my contribution to the delicious Thanksgiving dinner we enjoyed with Lisa and her family.  Today I'm thankful that I didn't have to worry about making the bulk of the holiday feast and especially thankful that since Lisa is also a clean-eating lifestyle follower, we had lots of good, clean foods to choose from and everything was delicious.

Any of you braving the crazy crowds in the morning (or tonight for that matter) to hit up the big, Black Friday deals?  Not me.  I hate shopping and I hate crowds even more.  Instead, I'll be hitting up the gym for another training session with Misty, followed by a spin class.  That's a much better way to spend Black Friday, in my humble opinion. :)

Training with Misty, Day 3. Arms shake much?

Holy freakin' cow, my arms have almost completely lost all functionality since finishing my workout with Misty this morning.  Today we did biceps and back, exercises such as various forms of the bicep curl, isometric rows, lat pull downs and...ahem, pull-ups.  I had to giggle a little when I saw on the paper with my schedule typed out on it, Misty had put "Pull ups (assisted if needed)".  As if I could do them UNassisted!  Ha!  Okay, I now have a new goal: at least one good pull-up, on my own.  I'm not sure how long it will take for me to be able to do it, really, no idea.  All I know is that we did the pull-ups first in the workout (using the machine that "helps" you) and moving on to the second set of exercises my arms were already shaking.

The next 50 minutes or so were sort of a blur, as I grunted and groaned my way through the most painful arm workout I've ever done.  No joke.  I couldn't feel my fingers by the end and the calluses on the palms of my hands have been throbbing all day.  My hands are still shaking tonight as I try to lift my soothing cup of Ginger Snappish herbal tea.

What does this mean to me right now?  That I have been sorely underestimating my strength and ability to push past what I thought was too hard.  I have not been demanding enough of myself.  As I was doing the last set of bicep curls using a bar, my muscles were just completely giving out as I tried to slowly lower them for the eccentric contraction and the weight would just "fall" down to my thighs.  I kept thinking Misty would see this and say, "Okay, that's enough reps."  But nope.  Instead, "Just 3 more!"  This is how my body is going to change.  I can feel that now.  I just hope I can keep this level of focus and determination so that when I'm doing all of this on my own, I will be the one saying, "Just 3 more!"

Training with Misty, day 2!

Here she is ~ Misty!  Beautiful inside and out.  I just love her.  I felt bad that she was nursing a back injury today.  Injuries suck. :(

Don't let her pretty smile fool you, she's hard-core.  She doesn't go easy, and I found that out today when my shoulders felt like goo after our training session.   We spent an hour in the weight room with today's focus muscle groups being shoulders and abs.  After we finished, she had me do an interval run on a treadmill.  After a 10 minute jogging (5.5 mph) warm-up, I took it up to a max speed for 30 seconds, which for me was 8.5 mph, then bump it up a level for the next 30 seconds - 8.7 mph.  Then back to 5.5 for a one minute recovery before doing it again.  After a few sets at that speed, the max speed was gradually brought down, until my 12th interval set was at 7.0 mph and 7.5 mph.  Then I finished with a 10 minute cool-down at 5.5 again.  45 minutes and 4.25-ish miles later and my interval run was over.

That was a tough workout, mostly because going into the run my legs were already tired and sore from yesterday's leg work.  It's all good, though.  I'm no stranger to pain.  I can already feel the change. ;)

I've been keeping a written journal of my food and exercise for the past few days, and will for the next couple of weeks while I'm getting used to my new training routine.  I also keep a blank page in between each day so that I can write down any of my thoughts about a specific exercise, how I felt before and after, or even just some positive affirmations.  I am determined to get rid of all the negativity that I've always had a tendency to hold on to.  I am the queen of self-deprecation no more!  Even though through these first couple of days I'm realizing how much I'm lacking in over-all body strength, I keep reminding myself that it WILL get better, I WILL get stronger.  With each day I'm gaining the knowledge and tools I need to succeed at this; each 1-2 hours I spend with Misty are like a crash-course in physiology and kinetics.  I'm just trying to take it all in and make the most of this week that I have with her before I'm left to do this on my own...for the rest of my life. :)

Training with Misty, day 1.

I had the best day.  One of my biggest worries about my new training plan has been not knowing how I would learn to feel truly "comfortable" in the weight room.  The machines, the bars, the weights, the buff people making lots of grunting noises...it's all very intimidating.  I learned today that sometimes (and let's face it, a lot of the time) our fears are unfounded.

This morning I met up with Misty and as I did a 10 minute jogging warm-up on a treadmill, she went over my new schedule with me.  It looks great, actually.  Not only is she giving me more than an adequate amount of my favorite cardio stuff - spinning and running - but even all the strength training excites me.  I realized today that most of the strength training I've been doing on my own was not near enough, both in weight and variety of exercises.

Once I finished warming up, we got busy in the weight room.  Today we did legs.

(These aren't mine, but they could be...hehehe.)

We spent almost an hour and a half, and still didn't even do all the sets of everything that I will normally be doing.  It took a little longer because she had to go over a lot of the basic stuff with me, because I pretty much had know idea what I was doing.  Thankfully, she was patient and helpful and completely focused on pushing me.  At the end of the workout, I realized how many other people were buzzing around the weight room and I had no idea.  I was so tuned in, soaking in everything Misty was teaching me, that I was oblivious to what normally would have been the deterrent keeping me from spending too much time in there.

Part of today's training also included a spinning class.  I chose to go to the evening one, so after doing leg work with Misty, I had time to come home and clean the house before the kids got home from school.  I stopped every once in a while to practice my dead lift form.  I couldn't get it right for the life of me when we were working on it at the gym, to the point that Misty actually removed it from my regimen.  She said it would be worse to do it with poor form, since I could hurt my back.  I practiced it so much today though that I'm hoping she will be willing to add it back in soon.  Also, I don't think my butt muscles have ever been this sore, especially this soon after a workout.  I hope that means I did some things right. :)

Now I'd better go get some sleep.  Another training session tomorrow, and this one includes an interval run.  Should be fun!